"You don't have to attend every argument you're invited to."

Successful couples don’t have any magic. Through trial and error, they’ve figured out how to create a relationship that works so they can get along.

When there are problems in the relationship, it’s not just one person who is at fault. It means that both are contributing to the problem – maybe one shouts in anger or frustration because the other avoids or criticizes. Each person has a responsibility to express themselves calmly and to communicate in a kinder more productive way.

Our partner is often the person we are emotionally closest to and therefore the one we are most affected by. How we act, what we feel and what we experience is shaped by this person and our intimate relationship with them. So, individual issues inevitably become relationship issues.

Next time you’re thinking "it's his/her issue, not mine," ask yourself:

What is my part in this?

You can’t change your partner or control their behavior but you can change your part. If you change your behavior, change in the relationship will surely follow.

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